cubical relief

This site is dedicated to a dark skinned white boy, also known as my brother, who has more style than I ever will.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Tiny Dancer

Everything in the universe has rhythm. Everything dances.
Maya Angelou

Monday, August 28, 2006

Finders Keepers

Tonight at the laundry mat, Matt found me those killer shades pictured above. Someone is probably missing them terribly.

P.S. This is only a joke. We left them at the mat.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Dog Farts and Cigarettes

I'm not going to name any names, but someone called me "strict" when it came to Reese sleeping in our bedroom. :) After thinking it over, I decided to give it another shot.

Last night, I was home alone. I got ditched after dinner for ultimate fighting, so I went to Hollywood Video and rented Shopgirl and Transamerica. It's much better watching movies when you have company, so I invited Reese. She wasn't interested in either of the movies, but she was interested in sleeping in our bedroom.

She did fine until around 11:30. That's when Reese started letting off the nastiest gas ever. Never did I think that cute, little Reese would be capable of such a thing. Matt got home around that time, so he decided to mask the smell with his disgusting habit which personally made everything worse. Besides the stench, Reese did exceptionally well. She now has a new place to crash at night.

Friday, August 25, 2006

Sleepless in Millard

As some of you already know, Reese got spayed a few days ago. I kept telling people that she got spaded, and until last night, that’s what I thought it was called. So every time that I would say that, I would picture the spade symbol in my head.

Since we got Reese from the vet, she has been whimpering constantly. Last night, Matt put her in the kennel, and she was crying really loud. Matt gave me this sad look, so I knew that he wanted her to sleep in our room. Ever since we got Reese, he has wanted her to sleep in our bed, but I have been totally against the idea. I finally gave in last night and told him to go get her.

It turns out that Reese is a bed hog and a restless sleeper. She took up Matt’s entire side, so he was forced to sleep at the foot of the bed. She likes to pace around and change positions constantly, and during the night, she fell off of the bed twice. The second time that she fell off, I left her on the floor, but then, all night, I had a dreams of her peeing all over the carpet. In my last dream, I hired carpet cleaners to clean up the mess, but they were unable to get the pee stains out.

Needless to say, tonight Reese is going to sleep in her own bed.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

My Father's Cancer

My father’s cancer is probably the hardest thing that I have had to deal with since my car accident 11 years ago and my parent’s divorce 4 years ago. Two years ago, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. When he was diagnosed, I just brushed it off. I ignored the fact that he was sick. I thought that the cancer would go away, and that everything would be fine. My long engagement and wedding planning kept my mind off of what was really going on with my father. As the months went by, he had been getting worse. His cancer had spread to the bones in his legs and his lower back.

Everyone has an opinion on how my father is doing physically. A few weeks ago, someone spread a rumor that if the chemo treatment that he had been waiting for didn’t work, that he could die within the next year. My body broke down emotionally, and I couldn’t stop crying. I have a hard time dealing with change and an extremely hard time dealing with death, and the thought of losing my father just saddens me. My father told me to stop listening to rumors, and that he would start sending out a weekly update on how he was doing. Before, if you asked him how he was feeling, he would say that he was fine.

Well the latest update is that he has started chemo, but the cancer may have spread to the canal around his spine. We will find out the results next week. Now all we can do is hope for the best.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

My Weekend - Far from Blue

It’s funny how running into someone at your local drug store can change your entire weekend. Yesterday, I ran into Amy. She’s the girl that I met at a girl’s night out a few months ago. We really hit it off, but I never got her number. She was a friend, of a friend, of a friend, and I really didn’t think that I would ever see her again. Anyway, I was really surprised to see her behind me in line. She invited me to her friend’s birthday party at Blue, so I went.

Blue was so much fun. Amy says that she loves the ambiance of the place. I totally agree. I had a lot of firsts that night. I drank my first martini. I spilled 1/3 of my first one though. I guess it takes practice holding those glasses. I ate sushi without gagging. It was actually pretty good. I took my first shot of sake. That was totally disgusting. I ordered shrimp that didn't look like shrimp. It was tasty, but it wasn't what I was expecting. I hung out with good people (which wasn't a first). We will have to hang out again soon.

Friday, August 18, 2006


Our air conditioning broke yesterday. Last night it felt like an oven. It was 90 degrees in our house. This morning, everyone was eagerly waiting for it to be repaired especially Reese.

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Thank You, But No Thank You

Here is some advice about my mother. She doesn’t like to take “No” for an answer! If you are not hungry and she is trying to feed you, take the food anyway. If she offers you a loaf of banana bread and you already have 2 other loaves in your frig, share it with your co-workers. If you tell her that you like some jewelry at her store, she will call you until you come and buy it. If she surprises you with a really bad fake Louis Vuitton purse, give it back, and run away when she is not looking.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Money Maker

I got this story from Brad’s mom. I thought it was cute.

My sister had a housewarming party last Saturday, so I suggested to Brad that he have a lemonade stand. He’s wanted to have one all summer, but we have been so busy. He had one and made over $10. He gave $1 to his older cousin Spencer to work “security”. He was actually soliciting neighbors as they walked by. At one point, some people drove by and bought a cup. They asked him what he was going to do with the money. He replied, “I’m saving it for college!”

Monday, August 14, 2006

Cousins Minus Five


The Outsider

If my Uncle Doug were a juvenile today, he would probably be in jail or in a home for boys. He was wild in his day. He was the tough guy that got the girl. He rode a motorcycle, got kicked out of numerous schools, and hitched hiked to places like New York. He got homemade tattoos, was thrown into jail more than once, got into fights, and partied hard.

Whenever the family gets together, he likes to gather around the nieces and nephews and tell us stories of when he was young. It doesn’t matter how many times we have heard them, they get better and better each time. I love how my grandma laughs along with us. She’s probably hearing many of the things in detail for the first time. I also love how my cousins look up at him in amazement. He always reassures us that there is no way we could get away with the things he did today.

He has made a good life for himself. He is honest, genuine, funny, and the best storyteller, and I love and respect him for that.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Happy 30th Ronnie!

Ronnie, last night you were a great date and a great dance partner. However, next time we go out, we need to coordinate the outfits a little better.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Just When You Think You've Seen It All...

You attend a wedding that has a belly dance performance!

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Real World: Key West

Is it just me or does anyone else think that this season of the Real World seems to be the longest season ever? I don't like any of the cast members, and none of the stories are good. I keep thinking that maybe I'm just getting old, and I should stop watching this shit. Nah, this season just sucks. Oh and to top it off, Paula is such an idiot. If your boyfriend beat the crap out of you and sent you to the hospital before the show, why are you with him after the show? Augh. Some people's kids. At least, she attacked him this time.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

The Three Ps

Hooray for Reese! She hasn't pooped, peed, or puked in the house in over a week. She has picked up a few other bad habits though. She learned how to open our bedroom door, and she has a new found love for our chair and ottoman. She tests us by first putting her head on the ottoman. Then, she props up half of her body like pictured above, and finally, when we aren’t looking, she jumps up and makes herself comfortable. She is too smart for her own good. Whenever I try to get her off, she starts acting like a crazy pup by chewing on the pillows, barking like crazy, and getting puppy slobber everywhere. I need to find my inner anger. Thank god that I have Matt. All he has to do is stand up and yell Reese, and she gets down and puts herself in the corner.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Brad's Lingo

Brad: We had a new kid at daycare today.

Me and Matt: Really? What's his name?

Brad: His name is Avery.

Me and Matt: How old is he?

Brad: I don't know, but he is a schoolager.

Me and Matt: What's that?

Brad: You know. He's a kid in elementary school.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Shoeless in Aisle 5

I was shoeless twice today. The first time, I went to leave my cubical when I looked down and noticed that my shoe was missing. I looked around my cube frantically, and I was relieved when I found it way under my desk. The second time was at the grocery store. A lady came up to me and said, "Miss, I think this is your shoe." She had picked it up a couple of aisles over. I looked up at her quite embarrassed and said thanks. Then, I placed the shoe on my lap.

You are probably wondering how I didn’t know that I was missing a shoe. Well, the answer to that question is that I have no feeling in my feet. Therefore, it is very difficult for me to find shoes that will stay on, and it makes shoe shopping very frustrating. I always find cute shoes, but it always seems like they are the kind of shoes that slide on. I’ve bought them before just to experiment. I have tried rubber banding them to my feet, taping them on with double stick tape, and I even tried using sticky Velcro. None of my ideas worked. If you can think of an idea, then let me know. If it works, then you are a genius. Otherwise, this weekend, I will be out and about looking for a shoe that fits, stays on, and has a buckle.